It did and always would, whispering a siren song beyond all he’d ever known. “It’s madness,” he said. “I wouldn’t exchange my sanity for power.”
She looked at him with those sky-blue eyes for a long time before retreating back into her suite and shutting the door. The last thing he saw was the sunlight glinting off the golden strands of her hair. She was his twin, but they hadn’t been truly bonded for a long time. Still, she wouldn’t let him fall.
Patient Zero could not be permitted to terrorize the world.
No matter how sweetly the sirens sang.
Chapter 11
A sharp blade
Thrust deep
Bloody droplets in the snow
—“Love Song” by Adina Mercant, poet (b. 1832, d. 1901)
ETHAN KNEW THAT he was about to put his life and his mating with Selenka on the line. The temptation to lie and lessen his complicity in the plan whispered at the back of his mind, but the claws that raked his insides were a warning—to lie would be to poison their bond in its very infancy.
He had to speak the truth—and if his mate chose to rip out his throat for it, so be it. “The gas attack was a setup,” he said, and saw the wolf come into her eyes. “I was meant to save you.”
The growl that filled the air was a thing of withheld fury that made the dog at his side freeze. “Why?”
“So you would then be more inclined to trust me and I could work my way deeper into your confidence. Their aim was to control you through me.”
Selenka’s reaction was not what he expected. After staring at him with golden eyes for a long moment, she bared her teeth in a feral smile. “What mudak thought this up?”
“He calls himself Operative C and he’s part of the Consortium.” Off-balance and unsure of the meaning of her reaction, Ethan stuck doggedly to the truth. “I’ve managed to track down part of his identity—he’s in computronic distribution—but I don’t have his name yet.”
Selenka gripped his chin. “Why did you decide to betray all that the Arrows stand for and align yourself with a man who would use traumatized empaths for his own gain?”
Once more, Ethan fought the urge to diminish his role in this. “I felt nothing when he came to me, was trapped behind a gray fog where nothing penetrated. I wondered if being a traitor would incite a spark in me.” Such a strange, inexplicable decision, and yet it had made sense in that time and place. “I will say one thing in my defense.”
Selenka raised an eyebrow.
“I didn’t know that he’d be using empaths.” Never would he have agreed to anything that meant another sentient being was twisted and used. “I believed empaths couldn’t be pushed to violence, and it’d be a member of the security team with Consortium sympathies who’d be the assailant.”
Grip tightening, Selenka growled again. “What if we hadn’t mated? Would you have gone through with it?”
“The entire operation was off the instant they drew blood.” Ethan shoved back the dark power that bulged against his shields, fed by his cold rage. “I was clear on that—no blood was to be spilled.” He’d been forced to be a murderer most of his life; if he killed again, it would be by choice and not because he’d been manipulated into it.
Selenka was caught between twin urges: to bite her mate for taking such a traitorous step, and to hold him close—because the amount of hurt that would cause a child to create a “gray fog” between himself and the world that lasted into adulthood was a thing of horror.
Incendiary rage might’ve still burned them both to a cinder—except that he was standing here, laying out all of it and making no attempt to hide his involvement. “You realize it wouldn’t have worked?” Trust so deep that it began to affect an alpha’s decisions took a long time to grow.
“I didn’t care,” Ethan said bluntly. “I had zero investment in the scheme itself. The only thing I wanted out of it was to know if it would erase the numbness.” Midnight eyes awash in darkness. “I set up a time-release communication to go to Aden should I be killed by Operative C. I didn’t stop the clock in the aftermath, so Aden will receive the information in the next minute.”
Truly, her mate was an enigma. “I’ll have to share the possible gambit with others in Trinity.” Though she would conceal Ethan’s identity—he was her mate now, hers to protect . . . or to destroy if he was a monster. That was the brutal reality that came with a mating between dominants.
Some couldn’t do it even if their mate turned to evil or became a bloodthirsty rogue who forgot their human self. In that case, it was the alpha who took care of the problem. But when you were an alpha, the responsibility for your mate was wholly in your hands. Selenka would not delegate it to anyone else.
If Ethan proved monstrous, she would be the one to end him—even if it tore her wolf apart.
“You should know that Operative C appears to be running this as a test,” Ethan said. “Its spectacular failure should halt any further attempts.”
Because instead of Ethan infiltrating BlackEdge, BlackEdge had stolen Ethan. Wolf still smug about that despite everything, Selenka released his chin just as Aden exited the symposium hall to make a beeline to them.
Ethan’s dog growled at the leader of the squad until Ethan said a firm, “No.”
What followed was an interaction Selenka found fascinating, there was so little outward emotion in it—yet a cadre of heavy, dark elements moved beneath. “If Operative C isn’t aware of your defection, don’t alert him,” the leader of the squad said. “We may be able to use him to get to bigger players in the Consortium.”
Ethan inclined his head, his eyes having faded back to their pale hue. “You have my apology, Aden. I didn’t think of the impact on the squad when I did this. It was never my intention to cause you disrepute.”
Aden Kai looked down at the ground for a long second before glancing up. “I failed you, Ethan. We all failed you. That you wished for vengeance is understandable.”
Selenka felt Ethan’s confusion even through their muddled bond. “He didn’t want revenge,” she told Aden. “Trust me on this.”
Aden’s responding glance quickly turned into a frown as he looked from her to Ethan . . . and seemed to focus on the bite mark on Ethan’s neck. “I see,” he said. “In that case, may I request that you not mention an Arrow connection when you share this Consortium play with other alphas? Distrust between changelings and Arrows will cause far more harm than good.”
Selenka had already come to that same conclusion. “Don’t worry. I’m not about to give the Consortium what they want.” Division, distrust, fragmentation, that was the Consortium’s goal. “Especially over such a stupid plan.” As if alpha changelings were children, to be maneuvered and swayed by a single person when they carried their entire pack on their shoulders.
“You may disavow me if you wish,” Ethan said to Aden.
Aden’s response was absolute. “Never. You’re one of us, Ethan, and you always will be.”
“Will you not always distrust me?”
“If Selenka hasn’t torn out your throat, then you’ve told us the truth,” the Arrow leader said quietly. “A mate can scent betrayal.”
Selenka’s smile was feral. Because Aden was right. Even the static in her bond with Ethan couldn’t hide the truth of him from her—her mate was intense, dangerous, and honest as a blade. “Other than alerting the others to a possible plan to gain their trust via miraculous rescues and other such,” she said, “this is now a private matter between Ethan and me.”
“Accepted.” Aden stepped back . . . but didn’t leave. “Just remember this, Ethan—you’re an Arrow. We may have let you down for too many years, but we will never again do so. Call us and we will come.”
Selenka kept her silence till after the squad leader had returned inside the building. Then she gripped Ethan’s jaw and pulled him down for a kiss that was all tongue and possession. He was breathing heavily in the aftermath, his lips wet and a touch swollen from the ferocity of her kiss. “Will you ever betray me or mine?” she asked.
The answer was a storm of devotion so violent that it came through despite the interference and jagged edges of their bond. “No,” he said while her head rang from the strength of his response. “I am yours in every way. You own me.”
Selenka’s wolf growled in exultation, but the human half of her struggled. Not because he’d given her his allegiance—the mating bond was a powerful force—but because of the lack of boundaries in it. “I’m a stranger to you,” she said, the taste of him yet in her mouth. “Aren’t you afraid I’ll use you to spill blood?”
“For you, I will.” No hesitation, no blink.
Ethan had chosen and if the mate he’d chosen wanted to use him until he broke, he’d permit that to happen. He knew no other way to be, had no fail-safes except for the gray fog—and never would he return to that.
Selenka’s response was a growl and another kiss that scalded him. “I have no idea what I’m going to do with you.” It was a snarl.
“Do it later,” Ethan said, unable to contain the words any longer. “Your back wound needs attention.” He’d been fighting the urge to push at her about that wound since he began telling her about Operative C. “You can tear out my throat later if you wish.” He angled his head to the side to show her that vulnerability, make it clear he wouldn’t fight her.
Another growl lifted into the air, the brush of hot breath against his skin as she licked over the mark. “We’re going to have to share skin privileges soon, or my wolf is going to strip you naked on the street.”
“After you see the healer,” Ethan insisted.
Selenka’s laughter was edgy. “Come then, mate, let’s go do this.”