She’d used magic in front of hundreds of people. In front of Blackbrooke. Had it been enough to allow him a glimpse inside her head? Everything was just so messed up. She wanted nothing more than to throw her arms around Kai and allow him to soothe her worries away. All of her worries. But he didn’t know all of her worries—her secrets—and she couldn’t tell him. She choked back a pained laugh. This would never work. How could she be in a relationship with someone she was constantly lying to?
When she saw the look in his eyes, though, she forgot about all that. All the lies, the omissions, the gloom and doom—for this one moment they didn’t exist. He reached out to touch her shoulder, his caress gentle, his magic warm and soothing. She threw herself against him, squeezing him hard to make sure he was real.
“I thought I’d killed you,” she muttered against his chest. “Your blood was on my hands.” She glanced down at her palms. There was blood on them, but not his. It must have been her own.
He wrapped his arms around her, drawing her in close. “It was just an illusion,” he said, his soothing whispers melting against her ear. “This is what they do in the Games, try to break a mage’s mind. Twenty-six fairies. Duncan wasn’t holding back.” His smile was ferocious. “But you held up. You beat their magic. You beat Weather Wizard. And kept your mind together.”
“How do you know Blackbrooke didn’t crack my mind?”
“Oh, trust me, you’d know. And so would everyone else. If he’d cracked you, you wouldn’t have walked out of that pit without assistance.” He kissed her forehead. “And you wouldn’t have the wherewithal to come up with silly questions.”
“I’m not sure I have much wherewithal left in me,” she said. “And I forgot all about stringing spells together.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
He hugged her tightly to him, the hard ridges of his body as comforting as any soft and plushy teddybear. No, more comforting. A teddybear couldn’t fight monsters with her. A teddybear didn’t have her back. Kai did. He always had.
“Kai,” she said, glancing up at him.
He met her eyes, the look in them making her heart race.
“I thought you were dead.” She brushed the back of her hand across his jaw. She wanted to kiss him so badly it hurt. “You said earlier that I don’t trust you. Maybe I didn’t. But I do now. I want to tell you…” She took a deep breath. “…everything.”
He watched her, his magic crackling against her, growing hungrier by the second. He snapped it down. “Sorry. When you stayed in the pit so long, I grew concerned. My magic is still tense.”
She fiddled with the collar of his shirt. “I like it.”
Magic pulsed in his eyes, temptation battling reason. He reached toward her face—then dropped it. It seemed reason had won.
“You’ve just been through a lot, Sera. As much as I want to believe this is you speaking, I suspect it’s the Fairy Dust.” His chest sighed against hers. “Fairy magic is quite potent. It muddles the mind like nothing else.”
“Stop it.” She frowned at him. “You’re ruining my revelation. I am not high on Fairy Dust. I’m just tired of not trusting anyone. Some people are worth trusting.” She leaned into him, teasing his lips with hers.
“Sera,” he said, his growl buzzing against her neck. “Don’t tempt me.”
“Why not?”
“Blackbrooke.”
The name was like a glacial shower. Her shoulders slumped, and she took a step back.
“He has spies everywhere. And if they find out about us, Blackbrooke will remove you as my coach.”
“Yes,” he said, his eyes following the pair of guards who were coming down the hall. One of them was the helpful fellow who had refused to heal her yesterday. His comrade looked equally friendly.
Sera leaned back against the wall behind her, feigning casual and relaxed. Kai stood opposite her, his arms folded over his chest, his magic rumbling like he meant business. The two guards passed between them on their way to the pit. They shot her and Kai suspicious glowers but didn’t say anything.
When they were gone, Kai spoke again. “I don’t want to fight you in the pit.”
“Of course not.” She shot him a playful wink. “You wouldn’t want to lose in front of all those people.”
The corner of his lip quirked up. “Your snark appears to have recovered.”
“It never left me.”
“Hmm.”
“It takes more than a few fairies to muddle my mind.”
“It’s not just the fairies, Sera. Right now, your magic is all over the place.” He lifted his hand, freezing the protest on her lips. “Don’t even try to deny it. I can feel the erratic beat of your magic. You usually do a better job of containing it. It’s the strain of the Magic Games, Finn, and the armies of vampires. Once that is all over—once we’re back home and you’ve had at least one night of decent sleep—if you still want to share your secrets with me, I’ll be there.”
“Are you always this stubborn?”
“Yes,” he said. “It’s a dragon thing. Deal with it.”
“Oh, don’t worry. I know just how to deal with dragons.”
“Yes.” His magic smoldered. “You do.”
“Oh, for Pete’s sake! I meant with my sword.”