Molly wondered if Virginia was feeling guilty. “He turned into a fine male,” she was swift to reassure her. “You must be very proud.”
The older female nodded, her expression difficult to read. “Very proud, but I also understand that his lack of a stable home has made him doubt his ability to become the sort of male who would make a good father and husband.”
Molly frowned. She’d never really considered how Garrick’s past might have influenced his obvious fear of commitment. Was that what he’d been saying before he left her place? Why he’d thought she deserved someone else? Someone better than him?
She had to wonder if he also thought that she expected him to become a Mr. Homebody, when that would obviously drive him nuts.
“I’m not asking him to change,” she said.
“Of course you are, my dear,” Virginia reprimanded, her expression softening. “Garrick knows firsthand the trials of having a family who weren’t there for him. And if you’re being honest with yourself, you would admit that the thought of having a mate who was constantly gone would eventually destroy you. You have an emptiness inside you that needs to be filled with a male who can give you all of himself, not just a small part.”
Molly blinked back the stupid tears that filled her eyes.
Virginia was right.
Even if she could somehow manage to convince Garrick they were destined to be together, he would either leave her for months at a time, or he would force himself to stay, and eventually grow to resent her.
A savage pain ripped through her heart, nearly sending her to her knees.
“So there’s no hope,” she rasped.
Virginia rose to her feet, moving to lay a hand on Molly’s cheek. “There is if you’re willing to compromise.”
Molly frowned in confusion. “How?”
“Think outside the box,” she urged. “Garrick can take a more permanent position somewhere that needs your skills. The Goddess knows that a trained Healer is always welcome among the Diplomatic faction outside the Wildlands.” She shrugged, her expression thoughtful as she mulled over the possibilities. “Or he could stay in the Wildlands to train the new Suits half the year, and the other half you could travel with him. So long as you’re together, everything will fall into place.” With a smile, Virginia squared her shoulders and turned to make her way back to the door. “Now I must leave.”
“Wait.” Molly hurried behind her. “Where are you going?”
“To remind my foolish son it’s almost time for the candle-lighting ceremony.”
“But…”
Molly gave a slow shake of her head as Virginia briskly stepped out of the apartment and closed the door behind her.
It felt like she’d just been hit by a mini-tornado.
Or manipulated by a very fine negotiator, a voice whispered in the back of her mind.
Catching her lower lip between her teeth, she moved to the mantel and touched the small star ornament next to her parents’ picture. It was the last gift she’d ever received from them. Her mother had told her that she’d chosen it so Molly could have something to make her Noël wishes come true.
Now Molly closed her eyes and made the Noël wish that came from the very depths of her soul.
CHAPTER 7
“You’re a fool, Loriot.”
The statement brought Garrick’s head around. He frowned. Raphael was headed his way, following the path of moonlight leading to the water’s edge.
Garrick snorted and turned back to face the bayou, and all the barges moving lazily down it with the current. “Tell me something I don’t know, brother.”
“All right.” Raphael came to stand beside him. “You’re scared.”
With a half-assed snarl, Garrick turned and gave his mentor a curious glare. “How the hell do you know about my fight with Molly?”
“I don’t,” Raphael said with a small grin. “But if you’re out here, staring into space—”
“I’m not staring into space,” Garrick corrected, gesturing toward the throng of barges in the water, and the yards of spruce trees bracketing the bayou on either side.
“Right,” Raphael amended. “It’s actually worse than that. Staring at all the Pantera heading down the bayou in their barges, huddling close together, the spirit of the season in their eyes and their smiles—waiting for the moment when they get to light the candles on their family tree. Yes. Staring at them instead of being with Molly, taking her in your arms, showing her just how goddamn much you want to claim her—”
“Enough, Raphael,” Garrick nearly growled. He didn’t want more images of his and Molly’s highly erotic time together sifting through his mind.
But they came anyway.
Christ, he could still taste her.
“Is the truth too painful to hear?” Raphael asked.
“That’s not my truth,” he grumbled.
“Bullshit. I’ve known you a long time, brother. And ever since Molly came to work for you, you’ve made it a priority to both stay away from her, and to know everything she’s doing or who she might be seeing when you’re not around.” His brow drifted up. “If that isn’t wanting, needing, loving, I don’t know what is.”
Garrick’s gut twisted. He hated his mentor’s words, but despised the truth in them more. At first when he’d hired Molly, things had been so easy. He’d come home for a day or two, then leave again. No problem. But as they’d started to get to know each other better, and their letters had started taking on a flirtatious edge, things had changed. Whenever he was home, whenever he was around her, in the same room, he couldn’t take his eyes off her.
He wanted to touch her.
Kiss her.
Claim her.
It was then that he’d decided it was better to stay away. He’d known what he didn’t have to offer. And god, what she did.
“Do you want to be with her, Garrick?” Raphael asked, cutting through his thoughts.
“More than I’ve ever wanted anything,” he said without hesitation.
The male cursed. “Then why stay away?”
Garrick turned to him, grimaced. “Like you said, brother, I’m a scared fool.”
Raphael nodded his understanding. “Glad you can admit it. And shit, welcome to the club.”
Garrick arched a brow. “What do you know about it?”
“I’m sure someday down the line I too will be faced with my fear. Giving myself to a female who holds my once-caged heart in her hands.” Raphael inhaled deeply, thoughtfully. “But perhaps there’s something worse for us to fear.”
Garrick’s brows knit together. “What’s that?”
The male’s gold eyes flashed. “Losing your mate. Watching every damn day as the female you adore above all things gives her love to another.”
The words took only seconds to sink in, but when they did, they took root and spread like wildfire. Molly giving her love, her body, her wonderful soul to another…
Never.
Goddess, never.
Garrick shifted into his puma and took off. He was several yards away when Raphael called to him.
“Hey! Don’t forget the lighting ceremony. Starts in an hour.”
Oh, that’s exactly where I’m going, Garrick thought. To get my family, bring them back for the Loriot tree lighting. This year, and, Goddess willing, every year thereafter.
Garrick gave his mentor one last growl before turning away and darting into the trees.
CHAPTER 8
Molly waited until she was sure the families would all be in their barges, headed down the canal to find their trees.
It wasn’t that the other Pantera wouldn’t go out of their way to make her feel a part of the festivities. They were always eager to ensure that she was included. Sometimes to the point where she wanted to scream.
Still, watching the others light their candles, while she stood alone by her tree, was always a painful duty.
At last, confident that the majority of the Pantera were gone, Molly slowly left the dormitory and headed toward the canal. In one hand she held her candle, and in the other was the small picture of her parents. They might not physically be with her, but she knew they would be with her in spirit.
Lost in memories of happier times, she was suddenly caught off guard when a shadow detached itself from a nearby cypress tree and prowled to stand directly in her path.
“I was beginning to think I was going to have to come in there and drag you out,” a low male voice teased.
Molly gave a small gasp, her heart slamming against her ribs as she ran an avid gaze over Garrick’s painfully familiar face.
She’d intended to spend the few minutes it would take to reach the canal shoring up her defenses before having to endure an awkward confrontation. Now she felt too raw…too exposed.
“Garrick,” she breathed, her tongue peeking out to dampen her dry lips. His eyes darkened to the color of melted honey as he allowed his gaze to linger on her mouth. “Where’s your mother?”
“She went to the tree with her new Healer,” he said, his voice distracted as he lifted a hand to gently push a stray curl off her flushed cheek.
Her heart squeezed with a wistful regret that she wouldn’t be with the older female.
Cutting all contact might be for the best, but it didn’t make it any easier on this special night.
“You should be with them.”
“No.” He stepped close enough to wrap her in the heat of his body, and for the first time she noticed that he wasn’t wearing his usual suit. Instead he was dressed in a casual pair of jeans and a cashmere sweater that emphasized his dark beauty. God. He was…divine. “We should be with them.”
We? She frowned.
“I told you, I’m not returning as your mother’s Healer.”
He cupped her chin in his palm, staring at her with an intensity that made her shiver.
“How about you return as her daughter?”
Molly’s mouth fell open, her heart forgetting to beat. “Garrick—”