He watched me, his face expressionless. He carried two bags and had a blanket tucked under his arm. His dark hair was shorter than the last time I’d seen him, and he was tanner too. Short stubble covered his face. He wore a pair of khaki shorts and a V-neck white T-shirt, and he looked sexier than I’d ever seen him.
Turn around and go home, Ellie.
That’s what I knew I should do, but my feet disagreed, and I took several steps toward him, stopping several paces away.
“You look beautiful, Ellie.”
I swallowed a burning lump in my throat. This was why I couldn’t be around Collin very often—not because of how drawn to him I was, but because I knew I could never be with him. David wasn’t the reason for that; Collin himself was. “Thank you.” I forced a smile, my eyes tearing up. “You look good too.”
His mouth pinched and I could see an inner battle wage in his eyes before he reached out his right hand—the circle and square burned into his palm clearly visible—and took my left hand, linking our fingers together. “Come sit with me.”
I nodded my consent and we walked fifty feet south of the pier until Collin stopped and released my hand, then set his bags down and spread out the blanket.
“Have a seat, Ellie.”
I kicked off my flip-flops at the edge of the blanket and walked to the center, tucking my legs to the side as I sat down. Collin lowered himself next to me, grabbed one of the bags, and pulled out two foil-wrapped sandwiches.
He handed me one, flashing his cocky Collin grin. “I knew I could get you to eat lunch with me if I held out long enough.”
I took the sandwich and released a soft laugh. “I didn’t know you’d been trying.”
He was reaching into the bag again when he stopped midgesture and looked into my face with a sadness that ripped my soul to shreds.
“And I didn’t say lunch,” I said. “Just that I needed to see you.”
He shrugged. “So I improvised.” He pulled out two bottles of water and set one next to me.
I opened the sandwich and the smell of a bacon cheeseburger filled my nose, making my stomach growl. I took a bite and couldn’t contain my groan of appreciation.
Collin laughed. “They say the way to a woman’s heart is through her stomach.”
I shook my head and chuckled. “That’s a man.”
We looked out onto the crashing ocean waves for several seconds in silence, both eating our sandwiches, so much like our last night in Morehead City. The night before everything fell apart. I had expected to be more anxious around him. I’d expected more animosity from him despite the fact that the last time we’d met had been on civil terms. What I hadn’t expected was this sense of peace. My yearning was still there, but this time I had it under control. It just felt good to be with him.
“When was the last time you were in the ocean?” he asked, keeping his gaze on the horizon.
“Last week.”
“You need to visit it more, Ellie. It’s a part of you now.” His voice was soft and noncondemning.
“It’s hard to get over here, even though it’s just a fifteen- to twenty-minute drive. When you take into account that I lose anywhere from fifteen minutes to an hour when I zone out every time I come . . .” My voice trailed off in frustration.
“You wouldn’t spend as much time in the water if you came more often. It gives you power. And if you’re losing that much time, you’re using more energy than you’re getting.”
“This Curse Keeper gig didn’t come with an instruction manual, Collin. At least not for me.” Ordinarily it would have come out as an accusation, but today it was laced with exhaustion.
Collin’s hand covered mine. “I know.”
His touch was comforting, and although I knew I should pull away, I couldn’t make myself do it.
“I’ve been thinking about what you said when I took you out on the boat, about me keeping things from you so you’d keep coming back to see me.” He paused, then stared into my eyes. “I think there might be some truth to it, but it’s more complicated than that.” He offered me a wry smile. “I’ve partially done it to protect you.”
“Hiding things from me won’t protect me. It puts me in more danger. I have no idea what to expect, and that could get me killed.”
Collin stiffened and started to say something before stopping himself. “Why did you want to see me?”
He changed the subject. He still wasn’t willing to fill me in on everything. Bitter disappointment seeped into my blood. “Do you know anything about people being able to see ghosts?”
He hesitated. “Why do you ask?”
My anger, dormant for longer than I’d expected, rushed to the surface. “For once would you just answer a goddamned question?”
His jaw clenched and I wondered if he was going to get up and walk away, but he blew out a breath instead. “Yes. I’ve heard of it. But contrary to what people believe, it’s not that common.”
“Are the ghosts good or bad? And how would someone know if they were ghosts and not spirits or demons?”
“I told you the first day you asked about good gods and bad gods that there’s good and bad in everything. People included. There are a lot of shades of gray, Ellie. Take Ahone.”
Pissed, I started to get up, but Collin wrapped his hand around my wrist and pulled me back down. “For Christ’s sake, you asked me a question, and then you start to storm off when you don’t like the answer. Did you ever consider you might actually know more if you stuck around and listened?”