Home > Some Were In Time (Shift Happens #2)(11)

Some Were In Time (Shift Happens #2)(11)
Author: Robyn Peterman

Werewolves could mate with whomever they wanted. Some lasted and some didn't. We had long lives and over-active sex drives. If you didn't find your true mate you often had several relationships in a lifetime. True mates belonged together. If they had crossed paths, even as children, they would never be happy with someone else. Hank was my true mate and luckily we had a second chance.

"Let me simplify this," Granny said as she put her hand over Dwayne's mouth so he wouldn't spout more redonkulous bullcrap. "Dwayne posed as a priest and performed an illegal wedding for two Were Cows. It's really not all his fault. He was enamored with the outfit, so he made a poor choice."

Dwayne nodded in agreement with Granny's summation.

"Still lost," Hank said.

"Bottom line," Granny continued as she seemed to realize her version had a few holes in it. "There might be thousands of illegitimate Were Cows roaming the earth that will want a piece of Dwayne. From what I remember reading back in school, they're extremely religious and would take issue with being Cow bastards."

Hank shut his eyes and took a breath in through his nose and blew it out through his mouth. This was never a good sign. It was all kinds of sexy, but it usually meant he wasn't happy.

"Good news is I hacked into a few databases and it looks like they're extinct," Junior said, watching his brother carefully.

"Your info is wrong," Hank said quietly. "They're not extinct."

"What?" Dwayne screeched.

"They. Are. Not. Extinct," Hank repeated tightly. "There aren't many, but they definitely still exist."

"What the hell?" I groused. "Does everyone know about Were Cows except for me?"

"Yep." Granny answered as she adjusted her boob tube and narrowed her eyes at me. "You skipped a lot of Were history in high school and college."

That shut me up because she was correct. Balls, now I wondered what else I missed.

"Rumor has it they're working with the Dragons," Hank said.

"Well, Dwayne, you're screwed. That could be inconvenient since we're going after the Dragons," Granny muttered the obvious.

"I'm going to hurl," Dwayne whimpered.

"Vamps can't puke," I reminded him.

"Watch me," he hissed.

"We have no clue if they're related to the Cows that Dwayne duped," Junior said reasonably. "What was the surname of the couple?"

"Dung," Dwayne answered.

I waited for the punchline. It didn't come.

Chicago was going to be very interesting.

***

"I got a Hummer," Dwayne shouted as he flopped down on my granny's plastic slipcovered couch. Granny's house was literally a museum to junk. She had more knickknacks than Dwayne had shoes—Dwayne had several hundred pairs of shoes. Thankfully we wore the same size seven.

I froze in terror. I was unsure if he meant a car or a blowjob. It took all I had not to ask. I wasn't going there again.

"There is no way all my luggage will fit in your tiny metal death trap. Not to mention my legs were cramped for days after we drove down," he informed me as he smoothed out his shirt.

Shirt was pushing it. It was a wife-beater with Hello Kitty in pink sequins plastered on the front. I was certain his booty shorts were going to make his legs stick to the plastic covered couch.

I heaved a huge sigh of relief and laughed. "A Hummer guzzles gas and is ugly," I said as I popped a cookie in my mouth.

"Yes, but it doesn’t smell like old French fries like your car does."

"Point," I agreed. "How many suitcases do you have?"

"Eight."

"Eight?" I gasped and squinted my eyes at him. How did a person go from one suitcase to eight in two weeks?

"I have to bring wedding gowns for my bi-weekly Skype sessions with the customers from Bring on the Bride. I want to wear gowns from the shop, considering that's what we're trying to sell," he explained logically.

As if anything Dwayne said or did was logical…

"Alrighty then," I replied as I wondered if he packed any gowns in my size.

"I did," he squealed as he clapped his hands with glee.

"Are you reading my mind?" I demanded.

"Nope, your face. I can only read minds of people I share blood with… oh shit," he muttered. "Maybe I did read your mind."

Dwayne began to immediately rearrange the miniature plaster rabbit family that was the centerpiece on the coffee table and I paced the room in agitation. Just as he started to refold the afghans into a fort pile I lost it.

"Dwayne, I thought you said your blood would leave my system in a few days," I snapped. "It's been weeks and I'm still feeling itchy."

"Itchy or bitchy?" he inquired with raised eyebrows that would have touched his hairline if he had any hair.

"Touché," I said, biting back my grin. There was no way I was going to let on that he made a good one.

"Essie, the operative word in your sentence was thought. I had no clue it would last," he said in a world-weary tone. Dwayne was as flighty as they came, but sometimes I could hear in his voice that he had lived lifetimes—and they hadn't been happy.

I closed my eyes and calmed myself. As much as I didn't want any of Dwayne's frighteningly unstable powers, it was what had saved Hank's life and my own. The strength of the Vampyre blood I'd ingested had allowed me to rip the head off of a Dragon with my bare hands. Killing the bad guy didn't bother me a bit—it was him or us. The simple fact that I didn't realize I had done it until after the fact was what I had a difficult time wrapping my head around. I knew I was being a baby about it, but it scared the hell out of me—and I was not a weenie.

   
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