“There’s something so familiar about you,” she said.
I kissed her lightly and let my hands fall to her hips. I traced her thin waist with my fingertips as I moved my lips to her throat and collarbone. She moaned.
“Evelyn…” I sighed. I was tormented, tortured, conflicted, hungry for her but wanting to protect her.
She squinted. “That’s funny that you call me Evelyn. Only my mother and grandmother call me that.” She shrugged, leaned forward and tried to kiss me again.
I put my finger to her mouth. “I can’t do this.”
She stepped back, took a deep breath, and covered her body again, this time shamefully. She reached for a T-shirt lying on the bed and threw it on. “What is your deal? One minute you’re all over me. I take my clothes off and you act repulsed, then you say I’m fucking beautiful and then say you can’t do this?”
I walked toward her and put my hands on her shoulders to comfort her. Then I did something really despicable. “I’m impotent, Evey. I have very extreme erectile dysfunction. It’s a medical condition and I take medication for it, but I can’t mix it with the X. It could be a fatal.”
Her eyes shot open with sympathy. “Oh, I’m so sorry. How embarrassing. I didn’t know.” It was almost like she adored Keith even more. My plan was backfiring. “You poor thing,” she said as she wrapped her arms around my waist and hugged me.
I had to get her and Keith to sleep so I could get out of his ugly, dumb body. “You know what I would love, Evey? I would love to just lie down, call it a night. I’ll take your number, and we’ll go on a proper date.”
Her eyes lit up. “I would love that too.”
She put on a pair of flannel pajamas with penguins on them then patted the space on the bed next to her. “Come lie down. I’m so sorry, Keith. I hate that I put that pressure on you.”
Geez, was she really into this guy?
“Don’t apologize. I’ve been trying to sort it out for a long time.” I was actually starting to feel kind of bad for Keith myself.
She cuddled up into the crook of my (Keith’s) skinny arm, and it felt like heaven. I’d never actually been to heaven. I’m not even sure it exists. I know it’s weird, an angel who’s never been to heaven. No one had confirmed or denied that there was a place humans went when they died. But as I lay there with Evey, even in Keith’s body, I started to think maybe heaven was on Earth. Maybe being an angel was like being in hell.
I waited until she dozed off, jumped out of Keith’s body and sat in the corner to make sure he didn’t react. He startled, looked around, and then down at Evey asleep, looking beautiful and serene. He smiled, closed his eyes. He was out. Thank God he didn’t freak.
At magic hour, I passed Joel’s angel, who said, “Hey, thanks, man, good job.”
I’d actually done something right, sort of, but I was dying for a drink. I flew to the market where Henry, one of the banished angels, worked. I wanted to get myself a nice little bottle of Scotch. But instead of Henry, an irritated Mona was posing as the corner market cashier… that bitch!
“Really, you? Where’s Henry?” I asked.
“Really yourself? I gave him the night off. I knew you’d be here. I know about that stunt you pulled earlier.”
“I’m tired. I had a long day at work. I still did my job. In fact, I was on quadruple duty tonight, if you hadn’t noticed. Some angels have no work ethic—like Abigail, for example. Why don’t you get on her shit?” I shrugged, grabbed the bottle, and headed out the door.
Mona called after me, “She’s not on probation. You are, Lucian.” A moment later, Mona appeared at my side and put her hand on the bottle. She focused her beady little eyes on me. “All I’m saying is to take it easy on the booze. I know you’re dealing with a lot right now.”
I squinted at her. “You mean you’re actually capable of feeling compassion? I need my paycheck please.”
She scoffed and then pulled an envelope from her pocket and handed it to me. “Don’t push me. Don’t spend all this money on alcohol either. Go enjoy your hours. Get laid for God’s sake, Lucian.”
“For God’s sake? Really, Mona? Why not for my sake?” I yelled. “Why is everything for him?”
She flew off in the other direction, mumbling something about being underpaid.
I drank only half the bottle on Evey’s stoop before cutting myself off. Proud moment. I was really growing up after two thousand years. I popped into Evey’s room because I hadn’t heard any noise and I wanted to make sure everyone was still breathing. They were. It smelled like bad breath—Keith’s, not hers of course.
They were fine, all wrapped up in each other. Magic hour was over, and time was speeding up, which was sometimes dizzying for angels. When I stumbled back against Evey’s dresser, she startled awake. She shouldn’t have been able to hear me. She jerked and inadvertently woke Keith up.
“Hey, babe,” he said groggily.
What a dweeb.
“Babe?” Evey asked.
“Yeah, we had a crazy night last night, huh?”
“What are you talking about?” Oh no, this was all going to blow up in my face. She leaned in toward Keith’s, to look into his eyes. “You look different. You seem different.”
“I don’t really remember much from last night,” Keith said. “I think I blacked out. Did we do it?”